Thoughtful Thursday – Insecurity

thoughtfulIt’s strange listening to others sometimes.

There can be so much pettiness that it makes me wonder if there is hope for a beautiful future on this planet.

We received our marks from first semester.

For the first time in my life, I’m an A student. I’ve not done anything mystical to get there. I just did my homework, handed it in on time, tried my best to follow instructions, participated in discussions, and usually accepted feedback without question unless it was important to question it. My note taking is just okay. Sometimes it’s dismal even. I pay attention in class. If I’m running late, I always make sure they’re aware. I’m behind in all my readings, but I’m still reading the books at least.

There has been the odd person that has grumbled to me about people they don’t think deserve to stay in the program. Sometimes it’s a general nameless grumble and other times it’s specific.

I don’t think this is a positive mindset nor professional behaviour. It’s okay to admit when you don’t have synergy with someone and would rather not work with them, but it’s shitty to claim you belong and they don’t.

Especially if you’ve never seen their work, yours is garbage, and you’re a terrible group partner.

I find it’s insecure people who spend their time complaining about someone else instead of putting the work in that will improve their skills.

Every day we make choices. If you spend more time gaming and reading junk than you do on your craft, maybe this isn’t for you.

Regardless, until you’ve been in the industry for many years and have earned a place by showing you can do good work and many other things we don’t yet know, maybe let the teachers decide who deserves to be in the program and who doesn’t.

I see an A like a brown belt. To the average person, it looks like I’m close to mastery. To most martial artists, it’s the beginning of a long road that may eventually become mastery. At least, I hope it will. In the martial arts I practice, there are 9 black belt levels. In one art, I’m at level 2. In the other, I’m basically at brown belt level. With both, I know there’s a ton more to learn.

Which can only happen if I choose to be willing to learn. It’s up to me to decide whether or not to take each assignment seriously. I decide whether or not I show up every day ready to listen and work hard.

I’m sorry if any of this seems harsh. I’m running on little sleep and half my lunch fell on the ground earlier, so perhaps I’m still grumpy from that. Or maybe I’m just tired of hearing bullshit from people who display the behaviour they claim to hate.

You must be the change you wish to see in the world.
– Mahatma Ghandi

If Ghandi doesn’t work for you, maybe someone more modern who gives a similar message with more direction is better for you.

And that’s how it flows today.
R~

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